| Now she's left cleaning up the mess he made.'s Journal |
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Now she's left cleaning up the mess he made.
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[22 Feb 2005|05:32pm] |
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Jimmy- Polaris |
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all i want is for you to be honest with me. im not here to judge, i just wanna know all of you. apparently that itself is even far too much to ask...
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[16 Feb 2005|08:13pm] |
i absolutely adore you.
♥
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[09 Feb 2005|10:24am] |
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stop dragging me back to that place i'm trying to run away from... it's all so intentional.
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| I wanted freedom but I'm restricted. |
[30 Jul 2004|09:23pm] |
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Strata- The Panic |
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haha well I should be in Pasa Robles right now, enjoying fine music with my friends, but...well.
work, good. we got this new guy, soooo adorable. he already knows a lot so its all good. got paid.. i only work three days next week during school.. haha yesterday i walked into work, got dressed, walked over to the front to sign my time card, and noticed everyone staring at me like I was insane, then they all told me that i didnt even work..? nice chrystal, real nice. lol
was gonna go to battle of the bands over in "Bingville" but i'm too tired and i gots to get up early again tomorrow. plus i didn't really like, like 3/4 of the bands playing so yeah.
i have no life...
um tomorrow, work, hopefully going to see the village before. i have to cash my check and i think target is calling my name, so i mos def have to stop by there sometime.
alright then..
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| there's a butt-load of gangs here... |
[25 Jul 2004|07:49pm] |
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mood |
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music |
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Muse- "Time Is Running Out" |
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um today...
woke up at 4:45am because we (nina and myself) wanted to go with my family to the lake. It was fun. Did a little tubing...tanning..burning.. and I also tried to ski?? yeah that didn't go to well. Got some bruises and cuts. but it was fun nonetheless. im really tired because of it but i'm unable to go to bed right now.
work tomorrow. sounds odd but i really like working.. except when they schedule me to work the sunday before school til 9. i'm also working friday which kind of sucks because neen, adam, adam, and i were supposed to go to the blink concert at the mid-state fair. i could have someone work for me but im extremely stingy and want the hours which = money, so.. whatevr. not a problem..
school is in a week. i'm so excited. can't wait to get situated in my new classes with my new materials and with new teachers and so on.
chris tried to get me to wear the giant pizza costume yesterday.. um no thanks? its nasty, has probably never been washed, and is really embarrassing just to wear on fremont for like a half hour so really, i'll pass.
i really, really like the maroon 5 cd. its awesome and i dont get the urge to skip any tracks like i do with most of the new cds i buy.
im done and im tired. goodbye
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[22 Jul 2004|09:03pm] |
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You're doin it again..
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[12 Jul 2004|11:41pm] |
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What the hell is wrong with you?? Don't you get it, your life is a joke. Do you not see?! You're running your ass straight into the ground.. And I truly feel sorry for you. This is not meant to be mean or cruel this is simply the facts, and it justs shows that I care...
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[05 Jul 2004|04:16pm] |
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mood |
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lonely |
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hmm, i have no life. it's 4 and i have not left my room all day. and this wont be the first day like this. all my friends lives are obviously far to busy for my intervention. i dont care. i figure i won't die if i have to spend the rest of my summer by myself..
i shouldn't own a phone. the calls i make dont get answered, and the ones i recieve are... non-existent? i dont even get calls just to ask me how ive been or what im doing anymore. i miss those. they were nice.
i want to talk to you. i just want to know how you are, hwat youve been doing. i called you and you didnt answer, whats that about?
I don't know what's worth fighting for or why I have to scream. I don't know why I instigate and say what I don't mean. I don't know how I got this way, I know it's not alright.
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[27 Jun 2004|10:36pm] |
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mellow |
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hit or miss |
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summer, ive decided, will probably be the end of me.
no work today. it was pretty chill..
slept half the day..went to the mall with neen and chels, then atia picked us up and went to her house, made brief convo...marlee came...went to papa murphys (not to work) picked up sabrina, took her home...went to marlees ate pizza...went home..and yeah.
tomorrow should be fun...boardwalk, hell yeah..
some people are oh so weird.
chris is a douche. hes a piece of shit pussy whipped bitch with no respect for his "friends"...he should be shot.
I hella wanna meet/marry mike d. hes the shit for real. i'd hit that bitch any day..
i am currently still not getting paid..
i'm tired,
later
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| Hey hey hey |
[19 Jun 2004|10:27am] |
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mood |
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 contemplative |
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music |
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Seether feat. Amy Lee- "Broken" |
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Um yeah hey long time no update? Short entry today but ya know.. Yeah so anyways summer's goin good. LOts of things to do which is always better than staying at home by yourself.
I got a job finally; at Papa Murphys. It's cool too because I get to work with Marlee and shit. My boss is so unorganized its insane. And somehow he can always find a way to blame his insanity on you..
Chelsea's here...
yeah I'm done, I can't do it anymore, it's a waste of my time, it sucks, and I hate hurting myself..
I went home yesterday for the first time in like 5 days because I don't really like staying there, so I sleep elsewhere?? aka The Payne Casa..
Um yeah thats aboust it,
Later.
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[18 Apr 2004|02:36pm] |
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NOVEMBER: Has a lot of ideas. Difficult to fathom. Thinks forward. Unique and brilliant. Extraordinary ideas. Sharp thinking. Fine and strong clairvoyance. Can become good doctors. Dynamic in personality. Secretive. Inquisitive. Knows how to dig secrets. Always thinking. Less talkative but amiable. Brave and generous. Patient. Stubborn and hard-hearted. If there is a will, there is a way. Determined. Never give up. Hardly becomes angry unless provoked. Loves to be alone.Thinks differently from others. Sharp-minded. Motivates oneself. Does not appreciate praises. High-spirited. Well-built and tough. Deep love and emotions. Romantic. Uncertain in relationships. Homely. Hardworking. High abilities. Trustworthy. Honest and keeps secrets. Not able to control emotions. Unpredictable.
( Click Here )
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[04 Apr 2004|07:44pm] |
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| AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!! |
[19 Mar 2004|04:49pm] |
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FUCKING SLUT!!! BUDRIS YOU WHORE! A B??? ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?!?!? STUPID ASS BITCH, YOU'RE GOING DOWN!
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| Another Monday, not wasted. |
[16 Mar 2004|09:26am] |
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mellow |
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music |
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Open Hand-"Time to Talk" Acoustic |
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I’m at Marlees right now. Her and Nina are still asleep and I'm, of course, up at the butt crack of dawn, so yeah.
Yesterday,..way fun!! I woke up thinking I had to work but turns out I didn't, so that’s good. Anyway I was really bored, as usual, and decided to take a little walk to Marlees house. She said we should go to Macys and shop for prom... (I dunno whats going on but I kinda, sort of don't wanna go, but all my friends are going so guess what I'll probably end up doing...) but we didn't end up going right then. Instead we begged Paul to come with Marlee, Casey, and I to the beach. After many "No I have to Vacuum and tape the House of Mouse"s we finally got him to accept our invitation. After Casey came by and we all hopped in her car and drove to the beach. When we got there we went straight for the water. It was sooo cold, but after a while you get used to the needle-like pain all over your body and start to go numb, so it's all good. lol We did a lot of body boarding because we're ghetto like that and don't have boogie boards. I guess Marlee got a stroke of genius and decided that we should all go get boogie boards. So we go to the nearest store, K-mart, soaking wet might I add, looking for boogie boards. So we got some, and then went to McDonalds, because us fat children need that greasy fatty-ass food.
We went back to the beach and swam a little more with the boards. We also felt like being immature and wrecking some lady’s mote that she built with her children because she was being mean to Paul, telling him that he shouldn't act like a three year old to her three year old after her boy went up to Paul calling him brother?? Paul just kindly said "Hey little boy I'm not your brother, please do not call me brother." And she went off on him, telling her little boy to walked the opposite way of Paul when needing to walk somewhere. Single-forty-five-year-old-mother-of-two-whose-husband-is-cheating-on-you-with-a-17-year-old, bitch. haha...We had fun.
Then I guess on their way back to Marlees after they dropped me off, poor Casey hit a car! Shit that sucks. Its just a little dent, I dunno why her parents flipped a bitch, but anyway. Hope your not in too much trouble Katherine my dear.
Then later Marlee, Nina and I went to Macys. Yeah that was a big waste of time for me considering I hate trying on clothes and that’s all we did. So we left Macys and went to the Beacon in Sand City, to go in the place where you wash your car to see the FOAM BRITE!! Nina took pictures.lol Then we went to Marlees and hung out.
Surprisingly my Monday wasn't boring
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[01 Mar 2004|11:20am] |
My soul it screams for you
can you not here it
my arms reach out for you
why cant you take them
my heart burns only for you
can you extinguish it
i love only to be loved by you
why cant you love me too
i long only to be held and cared for
why cant it be
am i to die alone and bitter
what the hell is wrong with me
my face is blackened and my eyes are sewn shut
with fear and sorrow
i no longer wish to love anything
just cut the heart right out of me
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| I no longer wish to love anything, just cut the heart right out of me |
[29 Feb 2004|09:20pm] |
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mood |
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Atreyu-"Lip Gloss and Black" |
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So I just got back from Neens. We spent the entire weekend sleeping and eating, sad I know but what can I say?! Let me just put this simply; House of the Dead, Thirteen and one crazy little boy named Cliff...haha
Anyways yeah this weekend was cool I guess. Friday I went to see The Passion with my aunt. And let me tell you it was one of the most depressing/appalling/and astonishing things I've seen. I was practically crying throughout the entire movie. Plus I never really put much thought into what happened with Jesus' crucifixion. It got me thinking afterward though, like why? ya know? Anyways yeah..
Then later that night Nina came over and spent the night. We watched School of Rock. It was way funny. I love Jack Black! Then Saturday my mom wanted to go shopping at Macys, and asked if we wanted to go. I did but Nina wasn't quite ready seeing how she was still in bed! So I went and left her at my house. I got this really cute shiny black jacket. I love it! Marlee came over later and saw my jacket and wanted it too. So we all went back to Macys and she bought the same jacket. But she gonna modify hers I guess so they can be different, so thats cool.
I've decided I want to completely re-do my room this summer. I wanna paint and shit. I'm thinkin red..maybe. I dunno but I just know it has to change. I’m bored with it.
Um yeah..Im failing out of high school, I’m never getting into college, and life couldn’t be better!! haha I'm crazy. I need sleep. Yeah that’s a good idea, See ya later
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| Yeah fuck you, you fucking piece of shit. i hate you. |
[13 Feb 2004|11:12pm] |
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mood |
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 enraged |
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Gary Jules- "Mad World" |
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So anyways I just got back from Chippers. There was this "hardcore" show or whatever and it was awesome! I've come too actually like the loud noise and the screaming. There were like six bands I think and they were all pretty good, especially, A Burning Water! My new found love is the lead singer of the band. He’s soooo cute! He kept making eye contact with me throughout all of their songs and yeah. He like practically sang an entire song to me, which was exciting! Then after his band was done playing, I was forced to go talk to him because he kept staring but I didn’t. It was intimidating because he was so beautiful. lol He actually came to me and said something but all I could do was babble some shit ass reply back with a dumbass smile on my face. Err! I’m such a retard. Whatever. What the hell else is new?!
So anyways, Valentines Day is tomorrow! It should be fun, I guess. I don’t know what I’m going to do yet, but I’m not worried. I rented Le Divorce, so I think I might just watch that.
Yeah I’m tired...
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